My Unconventional (Controversial?) Parenting Approach

Parenting is full of opinions, debates, and expectations. While some parents are meticulous about every detail, I’ve naturally taken a more laidback approach—so much so that my friends joke that I act like Sydney is my third child, even though she’s my first. I like to pick my battles wisely and live by the 'Let Them' theory, a mindset that allows kids to explore, take risks, and build resilience. Here’s what that looks like in my day-to-day parenting:

1. It’s Okay If They Don’t Want to Wear Shoes.

Kids love to be barefoot, and honestly, it’s not the end of the world. Walking without shoes strengthens their feet, improves balance, and connects them to their surroundings. So if Sydney wants to run around without shoes, I let her. If the floor is too hot to be barefoot, she will find out for herself.

2. Exposure to Dirt Builds Immunity—Don’t Go Crazy With Cleanliness.

Germs aren’t the enemy. Over-sanitizing everything can actually weaken a child’s immune system. I believe in letting kids play in the dirt, touch things, and build natural defenses rather than keeping them in a bubble. Sydney barely gets sick, and I think this is one of the reasons for that.

3. The 5-10 Second Rule Exists for a Reason.

If a snack falls on the floor, I don’t panic. A few seconds on the ground won’t harm them. Sydney spends half her day playing outside, snacking constantly. If I tossed every cracker that touched the ground, I’d have to haul around a duffle bag full of replacements. She’s eaten more floor crackers than I can count and is still thriving—kicking, screaming, talking my ear off, and all. Call me crazy, but I’m convinced this is one of the reasons she hardly ever gets sick.

4. Let Them Try New (Even Slightly Dangerous) Things.

Climbing trees, riding bikes, jumping off the couch—kids need adventure. Obviously, I supervise, but I don’t hover. A little risk-taking helps them build confidence, problem-solving skills, and resilience. I let Sydney try most things like climbing at the playground, going up the stairs, crossing the street without holding hands, etc. Of course, I supervise and I am close by for support and safety, but I encourage her to do these things on her own instead of holding her back.

5. Let Them Sleep Over at Grandma and Grandpa's house.

Some of my best childhood memories are from staying with my grandparents, feeling loved and spoiled by them. Kids should experience love from others outside their parents. Trusting others to care for your child fosters independence and deepens family bonds.

Sydney has been having sleepovers with my mom and Alex's mom since she was 3 months old! Everyone loves it! Alex and I get much needed alone time where we can wake up at whatever time we want, travel, hangout with friends, and just feel like our old selves again. The grandmas' are so happy to spend alone time with Sydney. And, Sydney is so happy being showered with an abundance of love and bossying her grandmothers around because she knows they are obsessed with her and will do as she pleases. Win, win for everyone!

6. Don’t Be Overprotective—Trust the World a Little More.

It’s easy to assume the worst-case scenario, but constantly worrying doesn’t do kids any favors. Instead of sheltering Sydney, I choose to trust, let her explore, and believe that the world has good people who will care for her, too. I avoid thinking of worst-case scenario situations or worrying about things that have not happened yet and I most likely cannot control anyways.

7. Encourage Decision Making

The first question they hit me with at my big law job interview was to share a time I made a decision. Making decisions is something we do all the time, and it affects a lot of people. It's really important to teach kids early on to make their own choices and feel good about them, instead of being unsure or needing someone else to decide for them. Sydney is not even two yet, so she's not making any big calls, but I try to let her make decisions that shape her day. I usually give her a choice between two things—like picking between two outfits, shoes, headbands or bows, eggs or waffles, park or pool... stuff like that.

Ultimately, I am all about raising confident, adaptable, and independent kids. I believe in guidance, not control—allowing space for them to learn, grow, and experience life without excessive interference.

You're welcome, Sydney! Love, Mama!